


all I want

by missymeggins



Category: Castle (TV 2009)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-23
Updated: 2010-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-21 03:14:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30015297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missymeggins/pseuds/missymeggins
Summary: They meet in a bar.
Relationships: Kate Beckett/Josh Davidson





	all I want

They meet in a bar.

After Castle leaves for the Hamptons Kate just gets back to work. The late nights and obsessive drive aren't really new, but there's less laughter in the bullpen and Ryan and Esposito don't know how to fix it. They call Lanie in and she can see that Kate is retreating from her own hurt, so she settles on what she feels is the best course of action; she takes her to a bar.

Lanie's a giggling mess by the time they've had three cocktails so Kate takes it upon herself to get the next round, and he's sitting at the bar with a beer in hand. He smiles at her. She waits for the inevitable sleazy come on – because what else is there in a bar on a saturday night? - but he doesn't say anything, just smiles and goes back to his beer.

Half an hour later she's back at the bar getting another round and he smiles again. Maybe it's the liquor or the faint stinging that still lingers, even beneath all the cocktails, from Castle's departure, but for the first time in a longer than she can remember, she likes the idea of getting some guy's attention. This guy's attention quite specifically.

She tosses him a flirty smile and says, “We meet again.

He smiles back, “Well, I'm not sure we really met the last time you were up here, so...”

"So maybe you want to change that?” she suggests breezily.

He stands, walks closer to her and gives her his hand. “I'm Josh.”

“I'm Kate,” she says, still smiling. “It's nice to meet you.”

She invites him to their table and Lanie gives her the eyebrows, but doesn't say anything. Josh spends the rest of the night talking to both of them, never excluding Lanie in favour of Kate. He writes his number on a napkin before leaving.

“It was good meeting you Kate. Give me a call sometime if you like.”

(She doesn't though, not at first.)

Castle returns after the summer and it's clear he's still with Gina. She didn't really expect anything else. It's not because she's angry or jealous but she decides to give Josh a call.

(She is a little angry and she is a little jealous. But she's also tired. They've been playing this game, she and Castle, of back and forth flirting and suggestions but still they've never been able to make a change and actually try something real. A relationship shouldn't be that hard and Josh seems like a good guy.

It's a little bit about Castle. Mostly it's just about wanting something more.)

He picks her up on his bike and she laughs because she hasn't ridden in years, but he just looks at her and says “I had a feeling you might like bikes.”

They have dinner at some little Italian place, nothing fancy, and he playfully draws the truth out of her about her former days as a 'bike enthusiast' as she puts it.

“I bet you look good on a bike,” he tells her and there's something about the way he says it, like it's just a statement of fact and nothing sleazy or untoward and it feels so good to be given a compliment that has nothing to do with her ability to catch killers.

She finds it easy to relax with him and just talk. There's even a moment, which sneaks up on her so quickly she doesn't have time to take it back, where she finds herself telling him about Castle. She doesn't mention the yawning distance there had between them over the summer, just the basics of their partnership and afterwards she breathes a little sigh of relief, because it feels good to just talk about him.

(With Tom it had always felt like a provocation to bring up Castle and whatever complications might exist in their friendship, it is still a friendship and the idea of hiding that makes her feel like a traitor.)

Josh comments that he sounds like a bit of a pain in the ass and she smiles. “Yeah. He is. But he's surprisingly helpful – never tell him I said that! – and the truth is, he makes the job easier to bear sometimes. He's fun to be around.”

Josh gives her a slight nod, and says, “Yeah. I can get how that would help. You have to find ways to laugh with a job like that. Same at the hospital sometimes, though not quite to the same extent I wouldn't imagine.”

They take a ride around the city on his bike before he drops her home. It's beautiful and she remembers just how much she loved riding in her youth; it offers a sense of freedom very few things can match. She invites him up for a drink and he leans against her kitchen counter while she pulls out a bottle of wine and two glasses.

“I like you Kate,” he tells her.

And that's it. She kisses him, because what more could she want than that simple truth?

He comes to the station one day to pick her up. She's not sure what happens while she's getting her things, but afterwards, as she and Josh walk out, he says to her with quiet calm but a hint of seriousness, “I think he has a thing for you.”

She doesn't know how to respond to that. It might be the truth, or it might simply be something that used to be the truth. She doesn't really know any more. But what she does know, she says out loud.

“Yeah. Well I have a thing for you.”

After that he doesn't question her relationship with Castle again and she never gives him a reason to.

The thing about Josh is that he reminds her of her younger self, the Kate who was open and adventurous and it feels good to be a little more like that girl again. He makes her laugh so easily and they quickly fall into comfortable routines; nights together and nights apart because they both have tough jobs and they understand each other's need for time alone sometimes.

It's not like it was with Tom. He was stability and safety, predictability even; he was the polar opposite of Castle, from whom she never knew what to expect, who continually upset the apple cart and made her feel alive in ways she didn't know she was ready for. Josh is the middle ground between them both.

In the recesses of her mind there's still the notion, sometimes, that maybe one day. She and Castle. One day.

She tries to put it out of her mind though because she deserves to feel this good now and Castle seems happy with Gina. She'll never be the girl who waits around for the guy.

Maybe Josh isn't forever. (She's never been all that good at looking to the future.) But right now he makes her really happy.


End file.
